We all probably have a love/hate relationship with social media. In these difficult times, how can we stay sane (and Christian) on social media?
I have talked often about the Social Media Strategy class I teach each semester at Taylor U. This summer, I wanted to rethink the class to make sure I am staying on the cutting edge of what’s happening in the social media world. I read (and highly recommend to you) two books:
Following Jesus in a Digital Age by Jason Thacker (Downers Grove, IL: InterVarsity Press, 2022)
Posting Peace by Douglas S. Bursch (Downers Grove, IL: InterVarsity Press, 2021)
I’d like to share with you a few takeaways that I also shared with my students, sourcing some quotes from these books as I go.
One key thing to realize right from the start: Technology is shaping our lives and our expectations.
We are so used to getting anything we want quickly. Amazon delivers in a couple of days. Have a question? Google it and have the answer in a matter of seconds. Click a button; get what we want.
The problem with this is that what’s real in life doesn’t work that way. Spiritual growth is a long, slow process that takes us a lifetime. There isn’t an app that will make us spiritual. Relationships — whether marriage or family or friends — take time and must weather ups and downs. How easy it is to decide something is too hard or taking too long, so we shut it down, let it go, turn away.
Technology has made us incredibly impatient. It has changed our expectations for how life should work. And not for the better.
So from these two books, I came away with 5 key points regarding our use of technology and social media that I shared with my class and I’d like to share with you. These are the things we need to keep in mind:
1. Keep in mind how social media is shaping us.
Wondering why social media can be such a toxic place (my goodness, especially now in a very divided country staring down a very divisive election)? Here’s what Bursch writes:
“Social media is more than just a medium for communication. The internet does more than magnify or amplify our expressions. Social media fundamentally changes what we say, when we say it, where we say it, why we say it, and how we say it. Most importantly, social media modifies who we are and what we are becoming. … [It is] revising our foundational understandings of moral decency, truth, and humanity.” (Posting Peace, 25)
What can we do? We can slow down and process our thoughts. Not everything we think needs to be shared. It can be easy to hide behind a screen. We would be far better to chat with people in real life. It’s so simple to share posts without taking the time to actually educate ourselves, look for sources, find the facts. And, the capital T of God’s Truth should guide our every post and interaction.
Also realize that technology is monitoring everything we do and where we go online. If you’re more of a political liberal or a political conservative, you probably read certain sites and follow certain blogs. The algorithms are watching that and so sending you more of the same. What this does is entrench us into our divisions because we often don’t even see anything that disagrees with what we think.
2. Keep in mind how social media is causing us to lose our ability to build relationships.
Again from Bursch:
“Many individuals lack deep connections or the ability to form deep relational connection because they no longer have to maintain strong ties to function well in our online society. …Online communication ‘provides just enough connection to keep us from pursuing real intimacy. In a virtual community, our contacts involve little real risk and demand even less of us personally.’” (Posting Peace, 38, 39)
What can we do? We can realize that anything of value takes time to build, and what matters are those real people who are in our lives. Yes, we may have 900+ “friends” or “followers,” but, at the end of the day, who is going to be there for us? Are we taking the time and putting in the effort to strengthen our real relationships — the ones we have today, the new friends we could find tomorrow?
3. Keep in mind how social media affects our ability to handle conflict.
And life is full of conflict. But when we are impatient and don’t want to do the hard work, when we have not learned the basic skills for conflict management, we end up divided in our own camps, with no one able or willing to work on a compromise. We hunker down into our own little groups who agree with us and treat anyone who believes differently like an enemy. Bursch writes:
“In-person communication includes various verbal, facial, and environmental cues lost in online communication. … Because we’re not fully present online, capable of using all our senses, we don’t use our full brains to solve the relational complexities we face. When conflicts arise, we have fewer mental conflict processing tools at our disposal, which frequently leads to argumentative, depersonalized, detached, non-empathetic interactions.” (Posting Peace, 48)
What can we do? Think about how differently people deal with conflict online vs. conflict in person. People say things online they might never say to someone’s face. And rarely do those online conflicts lead to any kind of mutual respect and understanding. Real life discussions — even with differences of opinion or outright conflict — can do both. Let’s try to have more of those.
4. Keep in mind how we as believers must engage wisely.
Unfortunately, our world is filled with lies, manipulation, and gaslighting. We are at a point where we don’t know who is telling the truth; we don’t know who to believe. We as believers, writes Thacker,
“ . . . must engage any manipulation of truth in our world with eyes wide open. … We seek to understand the issues at stake and seek to apply God’s unchanging truths to our post-truth society. … We look bad news square in the eye (and learn more about it so that we might respond in a godly way) because our current hope and future security are in Christ, not in the culture around us.” (Following Jesus, 61-62)
What can we do? We need to be willing to do the work of seeking out the truth for ourselves, not simply believing and reposting every tweet or every Facebook post. We need to be people who focus back on the Truth, who can cut through the noise to the issues that are really at stake, and stand strong for what we believe.
5. Keep in mind how we as believers must honor the image of God in others.
Jesus must be our guide and model even as we engage in a world vastly different from 30 A.D. He taught us how to love others, and this must carry over into our online lives. Thacker writes:
“As Christians, our job is to testify to the reality of who God is and how he has made us to reflect him. The people we interact with online are not simply avatars. They are divine image bearers, just like you and me (Gen. 1:26-28). This means we must engage others online with grace and humility.” (Following Jesus, 66-67)
What can we do? Turn that social media time into prayer. Remember that behind that faceless X handle is a human being, and that human being has beliefs and opinions shaped by a plethora of experiences in his/her life. That’s why in-person conversations are so important, because that person becomes flesh and blood and you can get at what’s going on, why the person believes as he/she does. You can ask questions, follow up, share your own thoughts, reach an understanding or agree to disagree while still respecting each other’s place in God’s world. Absent the ability to chat in real life, let your social media feed become your prayer list instead of a place to argue (you’re not going to change anyone’s mind anyway). Everyone can use prayer.
We need to be careful today more than ever. What advice do you have for how you engage technology as a believer?